Rajab names
In a scene of contemporary daily scenes, Khaled and Sarah sits on one sofa, each of whom is drowned on his phone, browsing social media, enjoying the scrolling process. Heavy silence fills the atmosphere, a cut dialogue, and an invisible “glass wall” that increases thickly over time. What does not realize is that this silence – enveloped with a smile – may be the quiet introduction to a loud end. Smart phones, despite their innocent appearance, may carry the seeds of marital bonds.
The separation here begins with hidden steps: the decline in body language, the atrophy of caring looks, and the disappearance of a sense of companionship, all of which – John Gotman’s research indicates in the science of relationships – is essential to building emotional intimacy.
When the two partners are busy with their screens, the real presence turns into an emotional absence, and marital life becomes two parallel pathways that do not meet. With the passage of time, each party feels lonely despite the existence of the other, so the emotional gap can expand day after day, even in the marriages that seem to be ostensibly stable, but the issue does not stop at the limits of emotional absence, the excessive use of the screens activates in the brain the bonus circles, by secreting dopamine with every new notice or message, as the research of behavioral neuroscience has shown (as one of the studies of Harvard University 2019). With habitual, the brain searches for greater doses of this stimulation, which may cause one of the two parties to consume more dangerous content, such as unethical content.
Here, a series of harmful repercussions begin: fictional images of love, unrealistic expectations about the relationship between the spouses, the loss of interest in the real partner, and the feeling of the other party that is not enough, beating the roots of self -confidence and mutual respect.
The final result of all this is not just a estrangement, but rather the loss of one of the pillars of the human relationship, which is the “common meaning”; That goal, dream, or experience that the couple shares and connects them, starting from small projects to the major visions of life, the concept that Victor Franklk explains in the treatment in meaning confirms that the loss of this common ligament turns the relationship into an empty shell, whatever it faces bright.
The screen, if we do not like it, may turn into a gateway to lose the dearest of us: the warmth of affection and mercy, and the sincerity of the eye, our most valuable moments are not the one that we harvest in the virtual world, but rather that we live face to face, turn off your screens, raise your heads, and look in the eyes of your loved ones before love melts in a cold blue light.
There remains an open question to meditate for the husbands and wives .. Is the addiction to reading the screens is a transient challenge imposed by reality and development in the means of communication, or is it an urgent call to search for the missing in our relationships?
* My marriage and family consultant
