Hanan Al -Khalfan
Not every eastern man has a high voice, nor every house in which the word is lifted in which manhood is heard.
Between the stereotypes that devote “strict masculinity”, there are men who chose silence as a weapon, and tolerance as a path, but they paid the price alone.
This article is not about the man who controls, but rather from the man who withdrew, not because he is weak … but rather because he no longer tolerates the battle every day.
It is said that the eastern man does not accept to be raised on him, and no one is allowed to direct it, but they did not tell us about those silent who live under the roof of a woman who is not satisfied with the word, but rather runs the house as a military general. The orders are issued, the sound raises, and it is decided alone from, when, how, and why, while he is silent, not because he does not see, but because he does not want to see his house turns into a battlefield every day.
It is that good, quiet husband who is presented to people as respectful and tolerant, but he is in fact a man who is exhausted, hiding behind a faded smile, and chooses silence because he was exhausted by the confrontations that he does not come out victorious. He knows when the right is with him, but he does not fight for him. It is preferable for the ship to go even if in the captain of others, as long as it will reach a safe righteousness, or so he thinks. It does not concern him with the decision, but rather that the family does not drown in a sea of noise. He is not looking for control, but for peace. But over time, he turns into a shadow of a man, walking, eating, working and pushing his family obligations, but he lost his features since he chose to be silent.
Some women, when they do not find someone to stand for them, exceed the limits of control to the limits of treason. And that, if it falls, then this man – even when he discovers it – does not revolt and does not expose, but rather his wound silently, as he swallowed the one before him. He does not want a scandal, and has no desire for an expensive battle that does not leave anyone. His children are afraid of his name, for his age, which can no longer tolerate new emotional calamities. Be silent. No because it is satisfied, but because it is tired of being always the party that fixes what is not correct.
The children themselves do not see that column on which the family is built, but rather feel the tone of their mother, read its fluctuations, move according to its mood, and avoid its anger. Only you frighten, alone decide, alone crying and standing. As for him, his existence does not confuse anyone, nor his absence raises questions. It has become more like a silent, familiar furniture, but it does not consult or thank.
And when he finally makes his decision, after years of internal corrosion, to get out of this marriage, the roles suddenly change. The society he asked for patience, attacks it because he decided to leave. The accusation of cruelty is famous in the face, and it is described as letting it, let his children let down, and let the stereotype of the man who be patient with silence until the last breath. Fires of a kind are raised against him: “What do you think about his children?”
However, he does not respond. Just breathe for the first time deeply, and feels that he survived. But no one asks him how he lived all those years. No one admits that leaving a marriage silently … it is in itself courage.
He is not silent because he is weak, but because he is honorable. He does not withdraw because he is helpless, but because he did not want his home to turn into a circuit in which words and dignities are ejaculated. But when patience becomes a burden, ignoring a betrayal of the soul, and silence in dignity … his voice must be heard, even if he does not utter.
“How many creams seek humiliation, for fear that he will be said by a rebellion.”
Frankly, this man does not seek compassion, but respect. He does not wait for justification, but rather admits his right to leave. The injustice does not change its shape if it comes out of the mouth of a woman, and does not get around when love is covered with conditions. Not everyone who left a house was a perpetrator, and not everyone who remained a hero was.
