Amal Muhammad Amin
I watched a movie that tells the story of a man who could not sleep well because he sees nightmares for a moment of the death of his little brother. Certainly represents the loss of the brother or one of the loved ones, a tragic experience that may have a profound impact on the child’s psyche and upbringing. The child may find himself facing complicated feelings of sadness, anger, and a sense of loneliness and guilt. These feelings directly affect its emotional and social growth, and their effects may extend to its behavior, academic achievement and relationships with others.
The child absorbs the concept of death
The child’s awareness of death differs according to his age and the level of mental development. Young children often see death as a temporary or something that can be retracted, while older children begin to absorb that death is final. Despite this, the emotional understanding of death may remain weak, which creates a state of dispersion and fear. Here, it is important that the child is defined by death with a simplified language that suits his life, away from misleading phrases such as “went to a better place” or “sleeping and will not wake up”, which may increase his confusion and fear.
Child questions such as: “Where did my brother go?” Or “Will I die too?” They are clear references to his need to understand the truth in a framework of reassurance and support.
The family plays a pivotal role in supporting the child during this stage, through:
Listen to his feelings with respect and containment without judgments.
Encourage him to express drawing, stories, or play.
Share warm memories about the late.
Show sadness in front of him, to feel that he is not alone in his feelings.
Honesty and tenderness are the basis for helping the child to build a realistic but reassuring image of the meaning of death and life after loss.
Likewise, if the deceased person represents a basic factor for the stability of the child’s world, anger may be one of the potential reactions, and anger may appear in loud play, nightmares, irritation, or a variety of other behaviors. The child often shows his anger towards the staying family members. Also after the death of one of the parents, many children will behave smaller than their age stages. The child may become temporary childhood, and needs attention and hugs even if this is not his habit, he may ask for strange food, and he may be wet his bed at night.
Also, the child who is afraid of attending a funeral should not be forced to go, because if the child is not ready, this in himself will be shocked. Also one of the things that can be taught to children is that the link to the deceased was not completely interrupted, only her image has changed, the child can be told that he can remember his beautiful moments with the late person and pray for him or ignite a candle or watch the pictures that were collecting him.
Children should be allowed to express their feelings about their loss and grief in their own way. Children are likely to show the feelings of sadness intermittently over a long period of time, especially during occasions such as religious holidays and family events.
As the second environment in the life of the child, the school plays a role of no less important than the role of the family. Psychological teachers and advisors can provide real support through:
Monitor the child’s behavior and make early signals when noting unusual changes.
Providing space for the child to express his feelings inside the class or through psychological support sessions.
Incorporation of the child into group activities that enhance his sense of belonging and reduce his feeling of isolation and sadness
Certainly, the experience of death is a harsh experience for the child, but it can be a moment of learning and growth if he finds the appropriate environment that contains his sorrow and understands his feelings. By supporting the family and school, the pain can be turned into an opportunity to build a more sympathetic and conscious personality. Sadness, despite its bitterness, may carry the seeds of maturity and human sympathy.
